Sex Position: The Seduction Ceremony

The Monthly Rag would like to take a moment to congratulate the new members of Konosioni by providing everyone with a sex-ritual akin to Kono’s own Induction Ceremony, complete with huge-ass robes and candles among other objects of questionable purpose and nature. First, initiate coitus at the base of Colgate’s hill, continuing upwards each time someone calls Campus Safety. Along the way, you are required to stop at the most scenic locations our campus has to offer, such as the Persson Steps, Case’s patio-bridge-thing, the Academic Quad, and everyone’s favorite: Frank Dining Hall, in order to take in everything Colgate has offered you (read: nothing). Once you reach Foggy Bottom, immediately ruin your partner’s orgasm, because it turns out you never got your second PE credit and have to take another semester before graduating.