Sex Position of the Month: The Pass Fail

Better start some cardio training, Colgate. This sex position requires exceptional physical fitness, hence its street name, the “Pass/Fail.” Just like Orgo, you will probably end up crying in frustration, but you need to pass in order to get into Med School. You and your partner will begin in the casual Lotus position, and from there begin the “walk and thrust” portion. You are physically carrying your partner in Lotus, while walking around the room. I hope you’ve been doing your push-ups. This is a very pleasurable, but difficult to master, and generally stressful sex position. Just like your Gen Chem class, you will either do it, or you won’t. The bar is set so low that if you just meet it, the sex will be pretty okay. Why even put yourself through it, you might ask? Well, we at the Rag just don’t know. Maybe you should ask your advisor, or your Dean for guidance.